«This is the way men act…»

• Direct bullying

• Non-especific

A. and K. are students in a Vocational school. They are both 17 years old and attend the lessons of the same specialty. They do not associate with each other either within or outside the school. One morning at the entrance of the school, just before the bell rings, K seeing. A. attacked and badly hit in the face with a sharp object.
A does not have time to react, injured and transported to hospital by a teacher. There he remained throughout the day. Doctors sewed the wound above his eye and submitted him for tests to determine whether there was a cerebral concussion, as he felt dizzy. The findings were negative, so the student was discharged this afternoon. K after the incident left the school and did not appear that day.
A was a mediocre student, popular with classmates, teachers liked him, he did not pose any problems in school, he was no absences noted, and he was the eldest child of a four-member Greek family.. His father was a bricklayer and his mother a cleaning lady to the hospital.
K had been indifferent to the school, presented poor performance and many absences, had relationships with just few peers and he was the third and youngest child of a family of Albanians, who came to Greece when K. was ten years old.
The incident left speechless both students and teachers of the school as they could not explain the behavior of K. There was no previous example of a problematic relationship between them. The Director of the school invited students who witnessed the incident to expose the facts. Besides the description of the event, no one expressed any suspicion of its cause. He was also invited the parents of A and K, but none of them came to school that day to meet the director. After that he informed and Youth Advisory Station of the Directorate of Secondary Education in the prefecture.
The next day, A. went to school accompanied by his parents. K. went to school without his parents. During the meeting with the Director and the presence of a member of the Youth Advisory Station A. insisted that the reason for which he became a victim of violent behavior of K. was personal, not related to the school.
A’s parents demanded the exemplary punishment of K. After a short period of time K explained that A. wanted to establish relations with a girl who K. also like. He had warned him several times and threatened him that if he dared to go out with her, he would regret it. A ignored K’s threats and met the girl. The attitude of K. was rather challenging, pestering the following: "This is the way men act…', 'I warned him and there was seeming chicken. ""Punish me, I do not care, I do not regret anything."
A. after that agreed that the cause of the events was his relationships with the girl. He hah faced threats by K. on his mobile phone, but never paid any attention to that.

Teachers met, discussed the event and decided to punish K for a week miscarriage. This penalty would force him to quit school after absences were already enough and the punishment would exceed the limit. K after the announcement of a penalty didn’t again go to school.
The counselor from the Youth Advisory Station stressed the need to communicate with parents of K. A week after his persistent efforts to communicate with her mother, she visited the offices of the Advisory Station. At the first meeting with her mother revealed a highly problematic family environment.
His father is a drunk and underemployed person with violent behavior, consistently beating his wife and children trying to obtain money from them. After subsequent sessions the mother was convinced that enduring this behavior harms not only herself but her children. She fled to social services to help her and her children
During the period after the event and with the help of the counselor, K’s father moved away from home and K. found a temporary job in the next year. He continued his studies at school with the support of the Youth Advisory Station.

The incident was quite violent and the school community initially "froze" because of the behavior of the abuser. But the handling of the incident by the Director and the Youth Advisory Station was pedagogically correct and the message given to the school community was that a methodical and fair approach would work towards exemplary violence and racism.

The personality of the victim shows an individual with soft tones who did not want to reveal the reason of the beating, possibly for fear of reprisals.

K. has been growing up in a violent family environment and having suffered repeated violence from his father developed a distorted perception of human relationships as well as on how to resolve differences between people. The behavior before the onset of violence (threatening messages) and after (stating unrepentant) is the manifestation of this distortion. By changing the family context and interventions K did not show such behavior again until he finished school.

The pupils of the school felt that the event was a very violent one. They could not explain why it was happened and of course blamed K for his behavior. They considered fair the punishment from the school and their attitude towards K was negative. They could not also explain the passive attitude of A. When after the turn of events they discussed with the teachers and learned the history of K showed sympathy for him. They think that the assistance from the Youth Advisory Station was very effective.
They also wondered about the role of the girl in the whole incident. They believe that she owns a part of the responsibility too.
They expressed the view that every time there is an incident at school the Director of the school and teachers should discuss in depth with the students involved before they give a punishment to them.
They also expressed the view that if there was a psychologist or social worker at school he could help many children. They proposed the director and teachers the possibility for the school to cooperate with the Department of Social Work, of the Technological Educational Institute of Patras in this direction.

Teachers were initially negative toward K. They found his punishment fair. After they informed about the family story of K, their view changed. They thought more humanly about him and discussed the issue with other students in an attempt to raise awareness about what is happening around them.
They agreed with their students that if there was a psychologist or social worker at school he could really help. They also agreed with their students for the possibility of a cooperation with the Department of Social Work, of the Technological Educational Institute of Patras in this direction.

The attitude of the director shows a methodical attempt to detect the causes of the behavior of two students as well as exploring their home environments. His cooperation with the Youth Advisory Station and tried to organize joint meetings with the students, their families and the counselor.

A’s parents worried very much about him and demanded the exemplary punishment of K. Requesting detailed data of K. in order to submit a complaint, despite the opposition of A. They were stressed because while they were insisting their child did not reveal the reason of the beating.
K’s Parents gives the initial impression of indifferent parents. But the things are not exactly so. The family of K is highly problematic family. His father is a drunk and unemployed man, with violent behavior towards everyone and especially towards his wife and children. The fear of the mother endures everything and does not appear at school. When she convinced that this attitude does not help either herself or her children she accept to received help from experts in an effort to improve her life and the lives of her children.

There was no a counselor at school to handle the event. A social worker with great experience on the issue informed about the case and commented as follow:
The etiology of the behavior of K is that in his family environment he is also a victim or witness to abuse of the mother than the father, so he repeats the pathological behavior in the same way.
He tries to give the message to the school (classmates and teachers) that he has the control and shows great, strong and tries to grow its low self-esteem and possibly reduce the stigma of racism because of his origin, thinking that by this way he gains the admiration of his peers.
The personality of the victim shows an individual with soft tones, who did not want to reveal the reason of the beating.
The attitude of the director shows a methodical attempt to detect the causes of the behavior of two students as well as exploring their home environments. His cooperation with the advisory station was an effective decision.
A counselor at school could help the abuser and the victim trying to treat the pathological elements of their personality and to prevent other side effects such as K’s school drop out. The counselor would also able to target actions to stop the vicious cycle of violence

There was no a counselor at school to handle the event. A social worker with great experience on the issue informed about the case and commented as follow:
The etiology of the behavior of K is that in his family environment he is also a victim or witness to abuse of the mother than the father, so he repeats the pathological behavior in the same way.
He tries to give the message to the school (classmates and teachers) that he has the control and shows great, strong and tries to grow its low self-esteem and possibly reduce the stigma of racism because of his origin, thinking that by this way he gains the admiration of his peers.
The personality of the victim shows an individual with soft tones, who did not want to reveal the reason of the beating.
The attitude of the director shows a methodical attempt to detect the causes of the behavior of two students as well as exploring their home environments. His cooperation with the advisory station was an effective decision.
A counselor at school could help the abuser and the victim trying to treat the pathological elements of their personality and to prevent other side effects such as K’s school drop out. The counselor would also able to target actions to stop the vicious cycle of violence

The event was originally shocked the school community. But it caused the beginning for a concern for this kind of events. The intervention of the Director was correct in principle. The penalty assigned by the teachers' could be a cause for discontinuation of K’s studies at school.
The intervention of the counselor from the Youth Advisory Station was effective.
Considering all the above must be emphasized the necessity of preventing similar incidents. Considered necessary cooperation of the school community with the appropriate local services and agencies to the appropriate precautionary actions to prevent similar cases.

Така действат мъжете.pdf